Same Sex Marriage is "Not Only Unhealthy, But it is Illegal in 48 States"

In wake of last week's news that Hallmark has very appropriately created four same-sex-themed cards for sale, the pathetic and rigid minds at the American Family Association want to remind the greeting card company that same-sex marriage is illegal in 48 states, stating that the lifestyle is "unhealthy" and "promoting same-sex marriage for profit is not the very best for families or our nation." 

Well, unfortunately for the right-wing Christian Fundamentalists who run and/or support the AFA, the two states that do allow gay/lesbian marriages are doing extremely well for themselves. So despite the coalition's warning/reminder, it's pretty safe to say that Hallmark will be just fine with it's very money-minded, innovative and liberal decision.

And anyone else who has a problem with this can eff off!

Lauren Conrad Looks Deeply Into Why She Likes Gossip Girl

In a recent interview with Eonline's Marc Malkin, Lauren Conrad made a profound explanation as to why she loves Gossip Girl, stating, "It's so gossipy..."

That's like me saying, "I love Beverly Hills 90210 because it's so Beverly Hills." It's like DUH! Of course GG is "gossipy" and of course 90210 is so Beverly Hills.

Okay, LC. Way to really put off those reports that you have no depth...

This Whole Paris Hilton/John McCain Thing Has Gone WAY Too Far!

You have got to be kidding me! Apparently, in wake of the ridiculous FunnyOrDie.com spoof that Paris Hilton did to mock John McCain's ad campaign commercial, the slutty heiress is now creating "Paris for President" T-Shirts. The skank-soaked tees will be sold at Kitson, naturally.

This is so dumb. Seriously, I watched that original ad campaign that McCain aired. It had images of Hilton and Britney Spears for a whopping .5 milliseconds. In fact, I missed their "appearance" the first time I watched. Not to mention, they are placed in the ad at the time McCain says the words, "most famous person in the world." So it's not even an insult to the two girls. But being the publicity-whore--and just plain whore in general--Hilton of course had to make a HUGE deal about it--even going so far as to have her mother Kathy write a ranting blog on Huffington Post. Like really? Seriously? Who the eff cares? Wouldn't you idiots be flattered that your candidate of choice used you in one of his campaigns? It's not like you heard anything out of the mouths of Spears or her camp. Because in the big scheme of things, who the eff cares?!

Not to mention, who on Earth--especially in LA--is actually going to walk around donning something that says "Paris for President" ? Give me a break!

Is it Bad That I Just Don't Find This Funny at All?

Perhaps I'm a bore. Or maybe it's just that I really, really despise Paris Hilton. Either way, this clip of a response to John McCain using a quick shot of Paris Hilton in one of his campaign commercials has been all the hype today.

I think the dumbest part has to be when Hilton says, "I guess this means I need to choose a Vice President. I think I'll choose Rihanna." Uhmm...okay....was that just the first name that popped into mind or something? 

I dunno...what do yall think about this lil vid?

In Case You Were Visiting Mars This Past Week...

• It was a battle of the Disney hotties VS the Disney Notties. 15-year-old Miley Cyrus and her trailer park teef, alongside her 20-year-old cradle-robbing BFF Mandy Jiroux, tried tried to chomp all over Disney darlings Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato. Cyrus and Jiroux made complete annoying idiots out of themselves (out wait--nothing new) in an attempt to mock Disney's most beautiful starlets in a YouTube video (see below). Cyrus has her granny panties in a bunch because not only is Gomez waaayyyyy hotter than Cyrus' skankazz, but Gomez is rumored to be dating Cyrus' ex, Nick Jonas. I don't know what's more pathetic: the fact that Cyrus and Jiroux are stupid enough to actually post this--or the fact that Jiroux is wasting her time dissing 2 adorable girls who are 5 years her junior!

• Shanna Moakler let her true classy colors show at a BBQ in Malibu, throwing a drink at Kim Kardashian, claiming the Armenian Goddess was sending more-than-friends-ish emails to her then-hubby Travis Barker. Moakler chatted it up with blog owner Nik Richie, and on the record, called Kardashian a "fat donkey," amongst other things. If Kimmy K. is a "fat donkey," then I aspire to be just that!
• Famous fashion flopper Mariah Carey done did it again, looking (as Perez would say) shitaeous as she showed up to BET's 106 & Park in a gawd-awful number.

X17 Embraces Britney's Shitty Parenting Skills

X17 Online, the unconditionally Britney Spears-loving paparazzi agency, irritates the hell out of me once again. Yesterday I posted that pic of cute little Sean Preston playing with mommy Spears' pink lighter. x17 had posted that photo, along with a series of others, demonstrating the 2.5-year-old tot grabbing Spears' lighter and cigarettes very curiously and eager.

It must have been a slow day for X17, who then proceeded to re-post the photos yet again this morning, stating, "Brit's just lookin' SO fine in these pix, and little Sean Preston is so cute - not that Jayden isn't! - we just had to post 'em again!"

X17 is and isn't as dumb as one would think for laying out a story as such. You see, the agency was able to state the obvious (Spears' son got a hold of her light-up stash and Spears therefore looks like an irresponsible parent), but still come out looking like the nice guys by (overly) sugar coating a very serious situation.

Although the agency most likely feels it was able to kill two birds with one stone, in the end, the site still comes off ignorant for praising such photos and pathetic for it's desperate attempts at kissing Spears' ass.

X17 is Desperate For Story Ideas

All these celebrity pregnancy speculations get old after awhile. It's one thing if there are ongoing rumors (from legitimate sources) that a person is pregnant. And it's one thing if someone looks significantly bigger in the tum-tum. But otherwise, questioning the possibility of a star being preggo is just redundant, cliche--and quite frankly, stupid.

Most of these pregnancy speculation stories are all outlandish, but today I have surely found the most pathetic. X17online posted photos this morning on it's site of Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon leaving West Hollywood restaurant Nobu last night. The site went as far as to title the posting, "Stop Hating! Is Mariah Pregnant?!?" And went on to list the following ridiculous reasons as to why Carey could perhaps be pregnant:

1) Mariah's puppies look a bit bigger than usual.
2) Nick's being more precious than usual with his wifey, carefully guiding her through the crowd.
3) There's definitely something in the water here in Hollywood!

In response:

a) It's called a push-up bra
b) It's called putting on a loving show for the photogs
and
c) that may be true, but I'd hardly add that to the list of "evidence" (as the site says) that Carey could indeed be preggers.

Truth of the matter: Carey may very well *be* pregnant for all anyone knows. But even if so, I would certainly not credit any of X17's "creative ideas" for informing me.

Fox News Attempts To Be Hip; Fails

Obviously Fox News didn’t study it’s hip-hop dictionary, because the conservative news channel made a lil boo-boo. Addressing Michelle Obama as “Obama Baby Mama,” it must have slipped FN’s mind that Michelle is in fact the hopeful president’s WIFE, and that to get technical, a “baby mama” is slang for the unwed mother of one's child.

Naturally, Bill Shine, Fox News Senior Vice President issued the following statement—the *third* apology-ish statement necessitated by the channel within *three* weeks:

“A producer on the program exercised poor judgment in using this chyron
during the segment.”